Have you ever talked yourself out of doing something, only for events to prove that it was the best option?

You had that intuition and inclination to do something, only for another voice to pop into your head and persuade you otherwise. It probably told you it wouldn’t work, or you weren’t good enough to pull it off, or even that you didn’t deserve the success it would have brought. And you listened, lost your nerve and the opportunity too.

You might feel a bit foolish at this, the way you seem to be able to hold yourself back and sabotage your best efforts. Be assured, you are not alone, you are just suffering from paying too much attention to your Gremlin. Most people have one too, that annoying voice that pipes up just when we don’t want it to, putting doubts in our mind and undermining our confidence. When we are operating at or near our peak – “in our flow” as it is often called – we just ignore the little pest. However, when we are feeling uncertain, perhaps trying something new or operating outside our comfort zone, up it pops: loud, persistent and persuasive. So, what can we do to stop our Gremlin holding us back?

The first thing is to identify our Gremlin (also called the Inner Critic or Voice of Judgement) and recognise it for what it is; just the negative, self-doubting part of ourselves. There’s little point trying to defeat it because it is part of our personality, an exaggeration of the self-criticism that can be helpful to us. The correct strategy is to recognise your Gremlin, acknowledge it when it appears, and then ignore it  - and consciously and courageously trust in your potential.

When you laugh at ghosts, they disappear. You can use humour to diffuse the power of your Gremlin - make a funny drawing of it, give it a cartoon voice and a stupid name. Now, when it shows up, are you going to be scared and constrained? Or just amused and empowered?

You can get others to help you deal with your Gremlin, too. Identify those who see the best in you and always encourage you to “go for it”. Share your goals with them, get them to hold you accountable and ask them to support you vociferously, especially when your resolve starts to wobble.

Your Ology coach will help you create the space and the trust in yourself to face up to your Gremlin, and support you in the longer term. Your coach will help you spot its appearance, work with you on strategies to deal with it and give you the support and encouragement you need to manage it.

Ultimately, working with your coach to create a purpose linked to your values and personal strengths will inspire you to give the greatest contribution you can and make your Gremlin to irrelevant. Then you will always trust yourself and ignore … er, what’s it called again?

By Colin Newlyn - Ology Business Coach, London

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